Satire
April 1, 2021, 2:41 pm No Comments
The senior class of 2021 includes 21 Lifers, a record number of students who have attended the School from kindergarten through 12th grade. In their final months, these Lifers are in the process of completing a series of three deprogramming courses to help them successfully integrate back into society outside of the School and its “quirks.”
If you have had an encounter with a lifer, you likely are aware of a certain characteristic vanity — they are quick to delineate themselves (the “elite”as they may refer to themselves) from the rest.
(I would like it to be made clear that despite coming to the School in the first grade, I am not, nor do I associate myself with the behavior of the lifers. In fact, they spent years reminding me of that/othering me, but, rising above, I dedicated myself to helping the lifer community by creating this program, with the help and perspective of lifer Arun Parwani, meant to prepare lifers for integration into the real world. “The world is a cruel, cruel place, and it’s time us lifers step into it,” said Parwani.)
While there are certainly countless entertaining stories to share from my observations of lifers over the past 12 years, some that shaped my reintegration program include: the time a class of ’21 student, who is to remain anonymous, willingly consumed several wisteria seeds before being rushed to the emergency room; the trauma students endured by having class with a certain music teacher and another with the fine arts teacher in the same day; the toxic pride they will never relinquish from finishing well in the annual World Games; and the unsuccessful entrepreneurship of those attempting to make a name for themselves in the silly bandz and take-apart-eraser trading business.
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Penny Reynolds '26 May 21
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Penny Reynolds '26
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